Chase Falcon Kington-Roller

Born on July 22,2008 at 11:10pm.
Our baby was an important part of our life, and lived in our hopes and dreams. Althought we said "hello" we also said "goodbye." We love this child and will never forget his sweet spirt.I had not told a lot of people that I was Pregnant, except for some family and a few close friends. It was something that I had not planned on happening at the time, but when I did find out that I was going to have a baby I was so excited and so scared. During the last 21 weeks Tim and I had started making some plans and were getting so excited for our little baby. I had felt him move a little, sometimes unsure if it was the baby or not, but I know at certain times it was him moving around in there.
On Sunday night I was having some severe back pain that had been constant for four days, I thought I had pulled a muscle at work. My mom was staying the night with me and planned on leaving the next day to go back home. The back pain was not going away and then I started getting really nauseated and threw up a couple of times, so she took me to the hospital. I thought that I would just get something for pain and go back home that night. When we got to the hospital they admitted me to the Labor and Delivery floor. A lot when on that night that I don't remember, but what I do remember is a lot of people were making a big deal about something I didn't really understand at the time. I was started that night on some MagCit, which is a muscle relaxer. The next morning I woke up really sore and not sure still what was going on. The doctor came in and told me that I was really sick and that My body was having a bad reaction to the baby. My liver was swollen and that is why I was having the back pain, If I had not come in I could have bleed out, I was on the Magcit to ensure I would not have a seizure. All of this was so confusing at the time, then she finally said that I had to deliver the baby to save my life. If I keept him my body was going to shut down and I would not survive. When I heard those words I keept thinking No that's no right, she must be wrong. Then she told me she paged a specialist to come and look over my labs and the other issues to make sure she was correct. My brother Heath came up and gave me a bleesing and I felt through that blessing that it wasn't going to end up the way I wanted it too. When the specialist came in he said the same thing that my doctor had told me, that the baby was fine but I wasn't. I had to deliver him now. I had no choice. I think that is what hit the hardest...knowing that my beautiful baby was just perfect but my body was not. They cleared the room after he said that and Tim and I just held each other and cried.
They induced me a couple hours after that. The next night I delivered him. We held him for a long time just looking at him and loving on him. He was so perfect with big old hands and some big feet!! We hadn't really thought of any names but we made a deal that if it was a boy Tim would choose the name and if it was a girl I would. Tim chose Chase which instantly sounded perfect. Both of our mother were there at the time and I'm so thankful to both of them for there love and the sweet care they gave to all of us. I also want to thank Tim for all the sweet things he did for me and the love he showed to me. I know this was really hard on him too, but he was so strong and I'm so thankful to have him by my side, and also our great families and friends for the prayers and thoughts we are truly blessed.
While this experience is still feels so real and painful at times I know that Heavely Father Loves us and blessed us so much to have that short time with someone so perfect. He will never leave our hearts. We love this little baby so much, he was a great blessing to have.
I hope this all makes sense I don't know how to explain all of the medical issues that went on, but I do know that Life takes unexpected turns and we can't and won't always understand the experices we have. I'm so thankful for the knowlege of the Gospel and the truths that I know. I'm doing ok, at times I break down and cry and miss our baby so bad I never think the pain will leave, but then I get a phone call from a friend or faimily member and I feel better. Time will heal our hearts. We are having a little graveside service for him on the 4th of August. Thanks to all for everything they have done for us. I love you.